Tuesday, August 31, 2004
I met my childhood friend here in Melbourne. It has been over ten years since we last played in the park together or slept in her bedroom. I remember how I took a stab at finding her on icq and was successful at it. That was about three odd years ago. Now in this new continent how everything comes full circle. However ten years is long and we have both changed.I am such a hypocrite: I want people to say I am different from the person they had known earlier but I fear the people around me changing too rapidly and drastically. I want to remain in the safety net I have cast for myself where the only thing evolving is... me.
I never talked to her or approached her though there were many opportunities to do so. I am simply afraid of ruining that balance time and memories have so carefully set up. She smokes now, clubs incessantly and according to various sources can be both a popular bitch and a decent gal. Does she remember me at all or have I actually been the one changing rapidly and drastically to the point of non-recognition?
I was listening to a Snow Angel by Kotoko [I think], the theme song for the jap anime Onegai Teacher. The upbeat melody, chirpy singing and carefree-ness reminded me of her. It is amazing how one song links up all the memories and impressions I had of her and those brief years of our shared childhood. Amazing too how the lyrics cut quite close to the truth.
Two shadows are standing side by side carrying frozen hearts
Our chance meeting in this snow-white world was a miracle
meaning that I'm not alone anymore.
Instead of searching for words,
I'm looking for snow angels
In the spinning, starless sky
Our chance meeting in this snow-white world was a miracle
meaning that I'm not alone anymore.
Instead of searching for words,
I'm looking for snow angels
In the spinning, starless sky
But I still think that I am alone in this pathetic show of sentiment.
lux at 2:37 pm